Happy Again

It is so funny how one day you can be depressed and the next day you are happy. I have never bought into the way this country uses the word depression like a 'cure all' diagnosis with a 'fix it' drug. I am 100% convinced that depression is a sham. Now don't get me wrong, I think people get depressed, I know people can get really depressed, and I agree that it is a real condition. But its how everyone uses it as an excuse that pisses me off. So think about what being depressed is... a bunch of down thoughts about yourself, your friends, your life, ect. If everything that makes you depressed is in your head, so is everything tht makes you feel happy. These anti-depressants, like zoloft or effexor are just a ploy to make money. Some pschy guy thought it up one day do describe a mood that people have, like being hungry. All of a sudent everyone is depressed, they need medication, they can't carry on a normal life and its all OK, they need medication. ITS ALL CRAP PEOPLE!! If your depressed all the time and cant shake it... there is something realy bothering you. Not to dismiss any real conditions, which i believe plenty are legit, but if your always unhappy something is making you that way. Maybe your living a lie, or you hate you job, can't stand your boyfriend, do to many drugs, are paranoid, something..... but its changeable. There is SOMETHING depressing you and if you can't think of that one thing, maybe your just to hard on yourself. But if you can think yourself into a depression... which i think is almost always the case, than you can think yourself right back out of it. Now don't think I am saying that this happens over night or anything, I belive that it may need therapy and some time depending on the situation, but meds?! Your just masking the problem. If you hate yourself there is a reason you do.

I can only think of two people in the whole world that I don' get along with. There are plenty i dont talk to anymore, but only two that I can say I wouldn't want to run into. It kinda plagues me too. I always keep a list of things that bother me and try to face them and fix them. sometimes it doenst happen, but i try. Why do i hold on to this stuff.. I mean on of those ppl I had a fight with in 2000... becasue being good makes me feel good. When i lay down at night I am next to myself. when i meet my maker, there will be no bygones. And those are the things that depress me, so i get rid of them.

Find that thing that depresses you and fix it, it is possible. The whole point is to have a strong mind and try to see reality as it really is. If your reality sucks, than focus on what you wanna change and what it will be like when you do. Its worth it.

Sorry if this didn't make any sense, im a little drunk and typing fater than ever trying to get my thoughts out before they leave me. kisses to all and be happy. (After how depressing my last blog was I had to counter it!)