Grown up

Life seems like it is so tough sometimes. The whole idea of 'growing up' has always been something you can't avoid. I mean no matter what happens you are always a day older in the morning and one day you will be old. I wish growing up was as easy as that. The reality of it is kinda harsh and pretty much sucks. There is no one there to tell you that, with maturity, your whole mindset will change. When you are young you only really think of yourself... This is something that doesn't change. But youth allows you to do what you want, act out your emotions however they may influence you, and focus on things that seem really important to you. Growing up changes it all. You still only think about yourself, but all of a sudden its about what is best for you instead of just what you want. In highschool if you want a pair of designer jeans (or some other material thing) it is all you can think about. You will earn money around the house or make it the only thing on your christmass list... Anything to get it. Now as a 'grown up' you still want those jeans just as bad, but you have to tell yourself how crazy it is to spend 100 bucks on jeans. Even if you can afford it, there is no sense in it.. They just aren't worth that kind of money. Your youth never considered any practicality of what you want, just that you wanted it at any cost. But when you grow up all of a sudden there are prices you just aren't willing to pay, no matter how much you want it.

Our parents used to always say 'no' to everything when we were younger.... And when you threw a big enough fit they would come back with something like "we do it because we love you" or "someday you will understand". It was never enough though. Think about that party, when you were grounded, as far as you were concerned your parents had committed a social homicide and you were the victim. In their explanations they never said "one day you are going to have to restrict yourself ".. Of course you probably wouldn't have believed them anyways.

Now that we are officially "grown up" things are so much more complicated. You are forced to deny yourself the things you want the most for the sake of it being best. You have so many decisions to make about love, life, money, and they always end in some rational process of elimination about what will work out or make the most sense. The days of just wanting something and being happy to have it at any cost are over. Who you date depends on what they do, their education, family, religion, looks, and the list goes on.... It used to be whoever was popular or cute. What clothes you have are dependent on your budget, what's practical, what your saving for, how it looks, not what everyone else is wearing.

I am not advocating that everyone should fit in some societal role and they have to strive to achieve what everyone else will admire. But that our decision making process has changed, it has 'grown up'. You want something and you have to tell yourself no because its the right thing. A happy meal everyday when your six is heaven on earth, now that your 26 it is a heart attack waiting to happen. Tommy jeans in highschool were the only way to fit in, now they don't fit your budget.

I guess the point in all this is that the things you want aren't always good for you and you have to learn to tell yourself no. Sometimes it seems so unreasonable to tell yourself no, like when your in love. How can love be wrong or bad for you? Sometimes you have to just lookout for yourself and what is best for you..... Even when it really hurts. Denying yourself somethings just seems so unfair and unreasonable, just like when your parents said no. In the end it is what is best for you and it will let you reach your goals. Just remember, no matter what, it's all about being a grown up.